shell

i’m in a hall way on hall street.

(i may not know that second part yet.)

 

angled light is coming in through the window;

we are bending over a large open chest,

digging through layers of shells:

 

strips of muted pinks, tans, lavenders, blues—

and so much white.

 

an old woman leans over us

and says: take as many as you want.

 

i dip my hand into the click–clack,

feel the swarm of calcifications:

 

light and thin and cool to the touch—

and so smooth.

 

i’m as timid as the tiniest shell.

 

what she must be thinking

as my hand sweeps through

the treasures like a wave;

 

how her edges must be shrinking.

 

i stand there for a long time, long after my sister

has scooped up her shells and moved on.

 

i don’t want to take them out of their home;

they’ve been so far removed already.

(i may not know that second part yet.)

 

how can she just give them away?

but there are so many.

 

how can i pick just

one?

 

i don’t remember the color,

but i can still feel that small sea

 

knot in my swinging hand

as i disembark down the stair

 

well—her serrated edges

pressing into my palm like a dime.

 

she is picked clean—

no sand left behind.

 

but she remembers.

 

 

 

 

 

l i s t l e s s

when you left

my words went with you

 

i felt them pulling away

like a great tide

 

how i longed to follow

them into the sea

 

how i longed to put an end to

 

them    you    me                 but

 

i see them floating up

like a buoy

 

i see them saving you

as they once did me

 

and i cannot begrudge you this

 

i watch for a time

from the dry shore

 

then turn away

 

turn back to    sand    sand    sand

 

a long shoulder of bone

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

anodyne

haunted

in the image of god

 

breath made

form

 

molecules

made movement

 

how easy it is to kill the body

 

but some thing

remains

 

atoms, adams

 

how easy it is to peel back the layers

 

to search

for source

 

but all that is found is blood, blood, blood

 

life is in the blood

but volumes in death

 

enough to drown you

 

enough to drown out the sound,

the pleading, the need

 

 

 

 

 

may it always be so

 

the words are ever with you

like the roar of wind

 

they sweep you off to places

you have never been

 

to climb the tall-dark mountain

traverse valley sin

 

to seek and find the seedlings

waiting here within

 

the light is shining in you

as has always been

 

if you let it, it will grow

forests of begin